Milestone Achieved *generic video game soundtrack*

I was just thinking the other day, there's no real track of all the things you've done in AIESEC (no, this isn't really an AIESEC post. Humor me and read on till the end.) except your own memory. Having said that, especially when you've been around as long as I have, and had as many experiences, it suddenly struck me that I might not remember them later on even if they were some crazy ones. So, here goes, I'm going to list all the experiences that I've been through here, that I think are worth mentioning, and also a few of which will be useful for me to remember when I'm re doing my resume!

• Attend a conference with 900 people, comprised of National organizational heads from 112+ countries, and helped organizing an event of that scale.

• Be the bartender at a conference with people from all those countries (It's not about the booze, it never is. What matters is that this translates to about 6 countries a minute conversations)

• Dance a synchronized dance with people from all around the world. Yeah there's no rehearsal. Everyone just lands up at the venue and dances the ENTIRE thing like they've rehearsed it together a million times.

AIESEC , 2013 - 6 things that made sense

I don't have the time right now to write this the way I want to, so I'm posting what I sent to my department here for now. The bigger one is in the works, and will be out as soon as I can finish it!

Hello My Dear Spectrum.

I don't quite know how to write this email in a way that I won't criticize myself for being too cliched about. But here goes.
 
This year for me has been about finding what I don't want to do, and a few things that I want to do. It was one of the biggest and best decisions so far for me to decide to take up TM, which so far was considered a fluffy portfolio, something that has no immediate significance - this goes against the very sensibilities of who I am as a person. This whole year, I have tried my best to bring TM up from functional anonymity to the almost intimidatingly looming presence in the LC that I believe it is today.
To do this has been a journey for myself, where I've experienced Pride, Shame, Love, Hate, Happiness, Sadness, Light, and Dark - both with the people I have interacted with, and within my own self. 

I write this email to you guys as the 8 people who will carry forward this beautiful department, and everything that it stands for in the LC, as well as for each one of us. These are small little things that I have learnt, in easy ways and hard, made a point to journal, and I hope you will find useful while creating your own, glorious stories.
 
1. Don't be afraid to be who you want to be tomorrow, today.
 


Your life is your own; no one (except your parents and closest friends maybe) will tell you/know how to tell you how to become the best version of yourself. There is no point waiting for inspiration from others, from life, from failure if you cannot find it in every breathing moment inside yourself. You are what you want yourself to be, and there is simply no time all this book of short stories we call life to waste in being timid and insecure about what the world would think, or whether you will fail. Promote yourself TO yourself; life will respect you if you do.

Grab every single opportunity you can find in this organization, it has forced me to do this and I could not be more thankful.

 
2. Don't kid yourself.
 


Probably the worst personal stories I have heard are when people are in denial, about themselves, or the reality in which they live. We don't live in a vacuum. We are living, breathing individuals who are trying to make a small dent in the world. You will not make a scratch also, if you don't discover, or make peace with who you are. If you are weak, then knowing and accepting that you are is where you will find your strength. If you are hopelessly lost in life, that's okay too, but accept that, and make a commitment to yourself that no matter what, the only way is up. Once you are completely at peace with these things, you will find that you will breathe easy, life will be like a song with a rising chorus.

Leadership is a liabilty if you are not secure as an individual. Be aware of, and confident in yourself as you live your AIESEC experience; you will go far just on the virtue of that.

 
3. Burn bridges that will drown you.



This is perhaps something that will be hard to accept, but that I have learnt at great cost through the last year. If someone or something is holding you simply for the fact that you are relying on them for your happiness, it will hurt you. Don't confuse this for hope; hope is to look forward to positivity, what I am talking about is to bank on a negative emotion because you are too chicken to find the resolve to find it regardless.
 
Don't be afraid to trust your team and your relationships, but go get what you want for yourself with a vengeance that regressive people that you might have to be around will be both, intimidated, as well as inspired by.

 
4. See each situation as an opportunity to become more awesome.
 


Lost your phone? Girlfriend/boyfriend cheated on you? Failed to get on the MB/EB? Parents didn't allow you to go to that team night or that concert, or that trip? Friends drifting away? Lonely as hell? Don't like your boss? It's okay! I'm not saying you don't have the right to be sad. But be big enough to take a step back and look at it as a learning experience; an opportunity to figure yourself out enough to deal with whatever life throws your way. You will enjoy every single day of life, or at least you will start trying to!

In AIESEC, you will find 10 things that you love, and 1000 things that you don't. Understand, that that is the point of it all. To throw all these things your way, so you come away being all the better a person for it!

5. I love technology. But I love people more.
 


With the internet and whatsapp and all these very cool things which I am addicted to as well, you may tend to forget the value of having that friend you meet at the Chai shop or at the Jam Room, or at the swings in the park at 5 pm every single day. Do not loose them, they can be from work, college, home, whatever; but always hang on to the friends that you see and hear every day in person. Why? Because a friend who doesn't get sick of you after that will not be scared to catch your bullshit; there is no Delete Message, or Edit Post, or any of that when you are face to face. 

Emails, texts, Skype, Hangouts, all these are all very convenient methods to participate in a team. But the best way to do that is to meet as often as you can. See your team every week or more, you will find friends for life, and work becomes an extremely enjoyable pastime.

6. Live life in technicolor.
 


Be intense in every single thing that you do. If you're going to the shop to pick up groceries for mum, do it as fast as possible, haggle for the best bargain you can, say hi to the guard both ways at the gate so you can build a rapport with him; hell, walk to the store as fast as you can so you can get a work out on the way! When you do this, sleep becomes irrelevant (if you want to sleep then sleep like a log in hibernation!), boredom becomes paradoxical to who you are, and the people you are around, your world becomes a Harry Potter movie, or Lord of the Rings, whatever you prefer - full of wonder, and of chocolate.

Don't hesitate to go mad at parties at conferences, to cry your heart out to your VP/LCP, to take up 5 different responsibilities at the same time during your exams. The people you know will always look forward to meeting you next, your work will be your play, the trees will sing for you and the breeze will lift your spirit without the smallest effort.


Well, I think I have outdone my own anti-jazz convictions with this, but I promise you, these are completely honest, and completely grounded little snippets of my time in this beautiful organization. I hope you find things to relate to and live stories above and beyond these as well.

I write this email with a sense of extreme pride and success; both personally and for what we have managed as a team. To everyone I've worked with, thank you for who you guys have been, and for being part of my experience. 

Cheers!

Critical Introspection

What is the better thing to do, be your unabashed self, impervious to the fear of judgement, or conform to what your surroundings are more likely to accept and promote? I don't believe in balancing between these too, I am too idealistic for that.

Now without sadsums to breach the sanctity of uninhibited, logical thought, I better get these ponderings out of the way.

Legend.

"Hey,
Been a while, yeah? How've you been?
Wow, the formality of this exchange is creeping me out a bit..
I don't get it. How do things fall out so much that you don't even know what's going on in your friend's life. But like I recently heard Dave Ghrol sing, "the deepest blues are black". Makes sense

Before you misunderstand me or this letter, I'll clarify. This is not me reaching out again. This is not an apology, nor a demand for one. This is nothing but a clarification. One long overdue

I think the crux of the matter lies in the fact that I'm a forgiving person. I can't hold grudges. So every time I forgave all those people you asked me not to, you thought I was weak. You still think it, don't you? You think I'm confused
I was confused. Yes. But it was a confusing time for me. You of all people should've understood that.
I spoke to you about everything because that's what friends did. There's a lot of shit from back then that nobody knows about. Just you…
If I'd known that me pouring myself out like that would have you believe I'm weak, I would've told you right then. But then I do tend to go blind towards the people I love.
I'm not weak. I've not had the hardest life out there(if anything i've had it bloody good). But I'm weathered enough to watch my back and not get hurt anymore. I always forgive, but I dont always forget. That's another thing you refused to see in me.

I think the worst part is how easy it was for you to give it all up. Throw the friendship away without even a second thought. The cherry on top of this beautiful sundae is that you used my own admissions and moments of weakness as an excuse. still do
And that is exactly why you won't hear from me. Not from the heart anyway.
The niceties will always be there, and truthfully too. I won't ever fake a smile. But I won't go any further than that

Next time you'll get it, maybe next time you'll make amends"

LEGEND.

WHOAness - A List of Music That Moves!

Time to snap out of this. I'm putting down here a list of songs, that with a good enough sound system (Coming Soon) will positively make me lose it and probably cry of happiness. Yeaaah I do that at times. #judgemebitches

1. Muramasa - Periphery
2. Some Day - Blackfield
3. Concealing Fate Part 2 : Deception - TesseracT
4. Beautiful World - Coldplay
5. She's Always a Woman - Billy Joel
6. Piano Man - Billy Joel
7.  Small Moments - Above and Beyond
8. Eternal - Above and Beyond
9. Themata - Karnivool
10. Awakening - Benea Reach
11. Alive - Pearljam
12. Burden - Opeth
13. Windowpane - Opeth
14. Dysphoria - Cloudkicker
15. I admit now. I was scared. - Cloudkicker
16. Celestial - Skyharbor
17. Take Away My Pain - Dream Theater
18. I Gave You All - Mumford and Sons 
19. Resurrection (Axwell mix) / Coldplay – Paradise
20. Hanging On - Ellie Goulding (Sound Remedy remix)
21. Chekele - Avial
22. The Longest Road - Morgan Page (Deadmau5 Remix)
23. Sun & Moon (Club Mix) - Above & Beyond
24. You And I - Medina (Deadmau5 Remix)
25. Crystallize - Lindsey Stirling
26. - Porcupine Tree
27. The Sky - Mat Zo feat.  Linnea Schossow 
28. Spectrum - Zedd (Arty Remix)
29. Live Forever - Ferry Corsten feat. Aruna
30. Love Is Not Enough - Above & Beyond feat. Zoe Johnston (also You Got To Go)

As you can see, my tastes in music as quite all over the place. For me technicality in music is something that gives me an adrenalin rush like no other. That doesn't stop me from appreciating good, experiential music.

These are songs that I may or may not connect with people, places, times or emotions so you don't have to agree with me. I am someone who feels my insides twist and turn (in a good way) when I listen to music that inspires me. Music like the list above takes me through emotions and serenity like nothing else has.

I probably won't have the same list even a week down the line. But that's the thing about music, nothing is right or wrong. And that's what makes it insane, the fact that the music that inspires you changes with you changing as a person. Friggin brilliant.

Comment if you think any songs deserve to be on here, or if you find something here that you liked. 

Cheers!

To You, Whoever, and Whenever you are.

I know there are people who say all these things never happen. And there are people who forget what it's like to be 16 when they turn 17. I know these will all be stories one day and our pictures will become old photographs. We'll all become somebody's mom and dad. But right now, these moments are not stories. This is happening. I am here. I am looking at her. And she is so beautiful.

I can see it. This one moment when you know you're not a sad story. You are alive. And you stand up and see the lights on the buildings and everything that makes you wonder. And you're listening to that song on that drive with the people you love most in this world. And in this moment, I swear...We are infinite.

Snapshot

Snapshot into my world at this moment

And it is AWESOME. For the most part.